valentines day – PAOLOPUNZALAN.COM

CAN YOU FEEL THE PRESSURE OF VALENTINES DAY?

To some extent, we call can.
That’s probably why CNN tells us that Valentine’s Day sales will skyrocket to $18.6 billion this year.

Why is there so much pressure? A few come to mind – social media posts, friends, culture, Netflix, songs on the radio. These and more can weigh a person down with so much pressure.

While it is good to celebrate love and the people we love, how do we not allow this day to dictate our emotions, lead to frustration, ruin expectations and harass us towards depression?

TO THE SINGLES:

1. Find someone to express your love towards.
I don’t mean to find a date or check out Tinder. You have so much love to share that there are many who need an encouragement or appreciation. From a relative in the hospital or a friend in dire need, looking outward rather than inward may be one of the best things you can do this Valentine’s Day.

2. Celebrate what you already have.
Try this out. List 5 things you are thankful for in your life. Pretty soon. You will notice a change of attitude. You have many things to thank God for.

Celebrate with friends. Go out and watch a movie or eat in Mercato. Just enjoy the company of friends God gifted you with.

3. Enjoy your day.
No pressure. Laugh. Live. Learn. Have fun.

TO THE MARRIED…

1. Clarify expectations.
We end up disappointed when we are unclear about some of our expectations. Worse, we compare our spouse to others that we see online. Be secure in your relationship. God brought you together. He is the glue that bonds you. Remember, the two have become one. He is the Author of your relationship.

2. Match expectations with your budget.
Because of the pressure that besets us, we forget that Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be just on February 14. You can celebrate before or after. That way, you even avoid heavy traffic and high costs. At the same time, Valentine’s Day doesn’t just have to be on February 14. It can be celebrated Jan 7, March 26, July 1, September 17. In other words, you can celebrate it every day with the one God gave you.

3. Enjoy your day.
Look at each other and say a prayer. Thank God for each other. Give each other a kiss (or more since you’re married. Ha!) But whatever it is, have fun. You are with the person gifted you with.

To the dads, make sure you make your daughters feel loved and appreciated. If they find it at home, they won’t need to look for it outside. I give my daughter a bouquet of flowers every year during Valentine’s Day so that when a man tries to sweep her off her feet by giving her flowers, it won’t really impress her much. Ha!

WHO DETERMINES YOUR VALUE?

My son and I were driving through Pasig one Valentine’s Day. He was about 9 years old at that time. As we passed by Canley Road where there were lots of motels advertising “QUICKIES”, he asked me why the rooms were so cheap and why they were rented out only for a couple of hours.

That moment became an opportune time to explain about the “birds and the bees”.

I told him that it’s unfortunate that people no longer wait for the officiating minister to say, “Now, you may kiss the bride.”
They end up saying, “I did” rather than “I do.”

Genesis 1:26 says that we were created in His image and in His likeness. What does this mean? This means that you and I have value. We are valuable not because of the clothes we wear, the car that we drive, the title on our business card nor the village we live in.

We are valuable because we were made in His image. Our value is intrinsic.

Which begs the question, “What would it take for your partner to get you in bed?” What would your boyfriend or girlfriend need to offer you to get you to sleep with him/her?

Let me propose to you that it should nothing be less than 2 words. Three won’t do.

“I love you” shouldn’t be enough.

You are worth waiting for.

Not 3 words but 2. And those 2 words? “I do.”

Until he can back it up with a ring, don’t give in.
Until she says “I do”, you can’t give in.

Jackson Pollack, an abstract expressionist painted a painting. It looked like my 5 year old can do the very thing he created. However, a man named David Martinez bought the painting on November 1, 2006 for a whopping $151.2 million.

You see value is determined by how much one is willing to pay for.

And the value you place on yourself will determine what and who you will give yourself to.

Now if you don’t think you’re worth that, you’ll give yourself for a whole lot less, then you’ll wonder why you feel cheap and he doesn’t treat you with the value you deserve. You gave him what he wanted at a discount.

Remember, you are no longer your own, but you were bought with a price.

You are so valuable that Someone sacrificed and died on your behalf.
Now THAT is real love.

Mr./Ms. RIGHT vs. Mr./Ms. RIGHT NOW

Because it’s Valentine season, the pressure is on.

You don’t have to be a love guru to notice. Just check the twitter feeds of people and you’ll understand what I mean.

If you’re not on twitter, just go to family reunions this month and listen to what the titos and titas ask. Besides “how are you” I’m sure you’ll get “o, hijo/hija, may boyfriend/girlfriend ka na ba?” (do you already have a boyfriend/girlfriend?)

I’m sure they’re well meaning and desire to start conversations with their nephews and nieces. But it truly becomes a pressure.

SEASONS OF LOVE

God works with seasons and timing.

People end up frustrated or forced if they don’t understand the seasons God’s allowed them to enjoy at the moment.

If you’re season is to focus on what God has put on your plate at the moment (school, career, spending time with family, starting a business), then have a blast! Be secure in the season God’s put you in and you’ll notice a change in perspective.

Being both single and married are gifts from God. And each gift comes with its own set of wonderful blessings.

In the meantime, continue to build godly friendships.

As what my friend Christian Flores says,
“Christ-centered friendship is the best foundation of a meaningful relationship.”

MR. RIGHT vs. MR. RIGHT NOW

The right thing at the wrong time becomes the wrong thing.

Because of the pressure, emotions can become overwhelming. When this happens, we tend to make decisions on a whim without thinking of the consequences.

“Mr. Right” becomes a mere “Mr. Right Now.”

“Ms. Right” is replaced by “Ms. Right Now.”

Because you don’t have a significant other at the moment doesn’t make you incomplete.

If you have given your life to Christ and He is Master and Savior, then know that He alone is truly able to bring fulfillment and significance.

Remember, the 3 most important decisions you’ll make in your life:

Who you will serve? (Master)
How you will serve? (mission)
With whom will you serve? (mate)

If you are looking for fulfillment and security in a romantic relationship, I can tell you now that you might end up disappointed.

Only One can fill all your needs – physical, spiritual and emotional… JESUS!