ON PURSUING WOMEN… A WORD OF CAUTION…

I had breakfast with one of the guys from church.

Just like many of the single guys in church, we talked about relationships, marriage and the future.

We discussed about clarifying why we do what we do. We easily fall into the trap of searching for that thing, that person, that relationship, that career, that gadget – to bring significance and security.

In other words, another functional savior. (To read my recent blog post on this, click here.)

In the course of the conversation, we talked about courtship and getting to know a person you’d like to pursue.

I asked him, “What’s stopping you from pursuing someone?”

Several valid answers were given.

I began to tell him some of the horrific stories I’ve been told of men reeling in ladies like a sea bass and when they’re all in hook, line and sinker, the nylon line gets cut.

They end up injured, hurt and bleeding.

In other words, DEFRAUDED.

Defrauding is “starting something you cannot righteously fulfill.”

Roses, chocolates, text messages, “mwahs”, facebook status updates referring to her, dinners… and when she’s has fallen, whether intentionally or inadvertently, the man drops her like a hot potato.

The Bible says in 1 Thessalonians 4:6-7, “No one should take advantage of or exploit other believers that way. The Lord is the one who punishes people for all these things. We’ve already told you and warned you about this. God didn’t call us to be sexually immoral but to be holy.”

Men, a word of reminder: women are gifts from God. They are meant to be treasured, not displayed and dropped when you get tired of them.

Proverbs 18:22 says, “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.”



19 responses to “ON PURSUING WOMEN… A WORD OF CAUTION…”

  1. Very well said, Pastor Paolo 🙂 Will share this to friends. Men should protect women. It’s one way to guard a person’s heart.

  2. So true, Pastor Paolo. I wish that men would read this.. Most of us single ladies wait and with God’s grace, not fall prey to these kind of men and in God’s time, be found by the man who will treat us as he should.

    God bless and looking forward to your future blogs

  3. well said po..hope to have it understood by many…

  4. Nice entry! 🙂 shared this to my friends 🙂

  5. well said po..can you also write a word of caution for women..especially those “pinaaasa” lang mga guys just for the momentarily benefits of it..tapos later on will drop them lang..after months or yeart of courting them..para makita din po ng mga women how to treat men fairly..thanks po

  6. Thanks for writing this, Ptr Paolo. I guess it takes real men, to tell boys, about this things! Very timely indeed!

  7. awwwww… 🙂 ptr pao 🙂 when i read this, it just really reminded and reinforced the value that Christ has put on me as a woman; the value He has put on all women 🙂 thank you! this was worded so well. i especially love this part: “Men, a word of reminder: women are gifts from God. They are meant to be treasured, not displayed and dropped when you get tired of them.”

  8. So true Pastor Pao 🙂 Thanks for posting 😀

  9. ay ptr pao, there was a blog i wrote 3 years ago. it kinda branches out from this topic of defrauding 🙂 although i mentioned that in defrauding, the responsibility is not just with the men but also with the women (that we should guard our hearts and be careful with our actions and choices) if it’s ok to share it, the link is http://sh3ryna.multiply.com/journal/item/133/SINGLES_BEWARE_Proximity_and_Frequency_are_DANGEROUS_things.

  10. well said pastor pao hope many guys will read this so they know how to treat a lady. more power

  11. […] came up.  (Boy, that topic has been coming up very often. You wouldn’t believe it.) Click here to read about my other […]

  12. pastor i hope you would write something about WOMEN pursuing MEN and if it’s just right to do so. i hate to say this but my friend is just too problematic about his sister who always PURSUES men, courts them and gives them gifts and cries like it’s the end of the world whenever she’s rejected.

  13. There are always two sides of the story. It’s if you can also write about women and their selection process. Nowadays it’s not enough that a guy be loyal and loving. I’m a firm believer in the saying “All is fair in love and war”.

  14. @donald. you are right. as one said, ‘none will be defrauded if there’s no one who will allow themselves to be taken advantaged of.’

  15. same thing can happen to men, Pastor Paulo. very well said.

  16. […] coming up very often. you wouldn’t believe it.) Click here to read about my other […]

  17. Agree on this, Ptr. A lot. It is very timely for our society today. I remembered what Ptr. Joe Bonifacio said re the same issue, He said, “Guys..don’t make a girl fall for you if you are not ready to catch her.” The same thing goes for us girls. We have no right to rouse in guys certain emotions we are not willing to fulfill. The goal is for both parties to protect one another as brothers and sisters in the Lord.

  18. Yes, i agree with you pastor. up to a point. while it is true that some men are like this, the bad boys. a lot of guys are nice. these guys suffer when they pursue women. they get rejected. or when they are already in a relationship with women, they get cheated on. so i think that integrity is required for both men and women.

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