PARENTING LESSONS FROM A SINGLE GUY

Me and My Dad camp was a blast.  It was one of the best Me and My Dad camps, if not the best that I’ve ever attended.  Kudos to Pastor Mark Tusoy and Glenn Quizon.

Pastor Joey and David Bonifacio did a Father and Son talk tandem.  It was nothing short of phenomenal.  You know when a person is teaching (from notes) and when he is simply speaking… speaking from experience and from the heart.

Quick run down on what I learned from David, a sharp, quick witted 26 year old single guy.

1. A father apologizing to his child is perfectly alright.  It doesn’t diminish respect.  In fact, it does exactly the opposite.

2. “The greatest inheritance I got was that I was ‘fathered.'”

3. A father is a definer.  If a dad doesn’t define his children, the world will.

4. Discipline molds and sets boundaries.  A dad has to define the boundaries.  In return, a child learns to respect it growing up.

5. On discipline and the rod, pain communicates the consequence.  Comfort communicates love.

6. What is not seen in the flesh is redeemed in the spirit.

7. A child becomes weak when there is too much comfort and is not allowed to experience hardship.

8. The best form of security a child can receive is to see his father being fully devoted to his mother.  “Faithfulness is not not cheating.  It is complete devotion.”

9. The best thing my father taught me is that no matter what, RUN TO GOD.  When things are going great, RUN TO GOD.  When things mess up, RUN TO GOD.  When it’s happy times, RUN TO GOD.  When it’s disappointment times, RUN TO GOD…. RUN TO GOD!

THE WORST IS NOT HAVING ANY

I’m no professional video editor, but I love putting videos together for my family whenever we go out for an overnighter or vacation.

I envision Jenn and I watching all these videos on our rocking chairs decades from now and remembering all the fun memories we were able to build with our kids.

Memories are powerful.  You can either have good ones or not so good ones growing up.  The worst?  Not having any to remember.

“Memory is a child walking along a seashore.  You never can tell what small pebble it will pick up and store away among its treasured things.”  ~Pierce Harris, Atlanta Journal

PARENTING TEENS SEMINAR

Parenting Teens: How To Keep Yourself From Asking, “Where Did We Go Wrong?”
Can’t miss this. March 27, 2010.

LIVE, LEAD & DIE

 

For our date night, Jenn and I watched “From Paris With Love”.  It was not your typical chick flick love story to say the least.  I don’t think she enjoyed the movie.  (But I did… haha)

One of the main characters turned out to be a suicide bomber (sorry to ruin the plot for those of you planning to see it).  She said she has found her purpose in life.

While not most of us will not agree with her found purpose in life, I dare say, at least she found one.

Too many simply exist.  They walk through life without purpose.  They live like everything’s just about them.  Wake up… Go to work/or school… come home… surf on the Net… have some bit of fun… sleep and the same rut happens again the next day.

Reading from the book of Judges, 2 names popped out – Tola and Jair.  The Bible says that they were born, they lived, they led and they died.  That’s it.  While I’m sure they did more than just live, lead and die, the Bible didn’t think it was enough to make it into the book of Judges.

Got me thinking.  Got me praying.

“Lord, I don’t want to just live, lead and then die.  I want to make a difference.  I want to make a dent in this nation’s history – not by my strength or abilities (knowing that I really don’t have lots) but by Your grace and power!”

WEEKEND WIND DOWN

* Friday and Saturday was awesome!  Got to speak at the Kids Ministry Summit in Caliraya where we had 400 delegates from all over the nation (34 churches all in all).  Mark Tusoy and the team did a phenomenal job.  The theme was “Making It Stick”… making the vision stick, the volunteers stick and the lessons stick in the minds of the next generation.  Kudos to the team.

* After the Summit, my family and I rushed to Ian and Claire Sia’s son’s dedication.  Ethan turned 1 year old and was dedicated to the Lord.  Children’s parties are fun.  Love the food at kids parties.

* I was so tired Saturday night … I crashed early.

* Sunday morning, I exercised… I needed it.  Got blood flowing.  Finishing touches on my message for the afternoon services.  Last weekend was the start of our new series “God & Gov.”

* Monday was super fun. Went to Lakeshore to try to fish.  Operative word was “try”.  But when we changed the bait from feeds to old school worms, then we caught some finally.  Flew kites.  Rode pedal boats.  Went up the lighthouse.  Looong yet absolutely fun day.  I often thank God for Monday family days.

RYAN’S HOMERUN

Please allow me to be a proud daddy for a moment and share this homerun video by my 6 year old, Ryan.  This was last Saturday, February 6, 2010.  So proud of Ryan!

WEEKEND WIND DOWN

This weekend after the prayer and fasting went by like a whirlwind…

Friday

– After office, I had a wedding to officiate – what an awesome wedding!  A young single mom who found her knight in shining armor.  Almost brought me to tears seeing her march down the aisle and finally receiving the promise of God for her life.  God never ceases to amaze me in how much He takes care of His kids.

– Rushed to a 70th birthday party of one of the guys from church.  In his speech, he mentions that after a quintuple bypass and kidney transplant, it is all because of JESUS that he is where he is today.  I love hearing people give honor to where honor is due.  Amazing man!

– Ran to a family reunion which was happening at our house.  Since my sister, Princess, is here in town, several reunions are taking place because she hasn’t been back in about 3 years.  Love it that my sister is in town.  I really miss her.

Saturday

– Saturday was crazier.  In the morning, I had a baseball game to help coach.  My son, Ryan’s team played.  We weren’t supposed to keep score because at his age bracket, each game should end as a tie every time.  But we all know that a game is not a game if we don’t know who won.  So I made a mental note.  We won 17-9.  Haha!

– Rushed to a baby dedication I had to officiate.  It was a powerful time.  Not too many who attended come to church but God’s presence showed up and it was a touching ceremony.  Any event becomes powerful when God shows up. Galing.

– Ran to Antipolo for a very close friend’s 40th birthday party.  Glenn,  a very good friend, put together a surprise party for his wife.  It was well planned and excellently executed.  Happy birthday, Jeje.

Sunday

– Sundays are always pretty packed for me but this Sunday was extra packed.  Brought the family in the morning to attend church.  Jenn was emceeing the morning services.  Kids attended also.  They like attending the morning services.  I think because I’m not the one preaching (since I preach at 5 and 7 pm). haha.

– Ran to a wedding to attend around 1:30.

– Rushed back to Victory Fort at 5 pm to preach at the 5 and 7 pm.

– Ran back to the wedding reception at Wack Wack club house (yes it was a loooooong reception).  I got to catch the tail end of the party.

Huff… puff… whew!

“BUT IT’S SHORTER”

Coming home from church last night, Ryan and Janina rode with me while Nathan and Joaquin rode with their mom since they used another car coming from a birthday party.

A conversation between Janina, my 10 year old and Ryan, my 6 year old that made me bust out laughing went like this…

RYAN: I don’t like Robert (not his real name).  He’s weird.

ME: Ryan, be nice.  Don’t say that.

JANINA: Ryan, you can say it this way – “He’s different and unique.  I don’t get along with him because I dislike the way he acts.”

RYAN: Huh?  But “I don’t like Robert” is shorter!

Oo nga naman.

DADDY CHRISTMAS TIPS PART 2

Click here for part 1

Because of the many parties, sometimes the last people we get to spend time with is our kids.  I know I’ve fallen into that trap.  But we have to be deliberate for this thing not to happen.

My wife is so good with this.  She prints out a December calendar and gets us all in a meeting to plan the whole month.  Remember if you don’t fill your calendar, someone else will.

For this month’s plans…

  • Our own family Christmas dinner – this is a time when we usually spend Christmas dinner just for us.  We go to a restaurant we’ve gone back every December 23 for the past several years – Outback in C5.  We have our little celebration and do our gift giving there.  It’s always a highlight in our Christmas celebration.
  • Watching the light show at Ayala
  • Ornament making
  • Visiting Real Life’s Feeding program

to be continued…

CHRISTMAS DADDY TIPS PART 1

When one hears of the word ‘tradition,’ it can either be negative or positive.  However, in our context these days, tradition can carry a negative connotation – from the traditions Pharisees upheld so they can support their legalism to traditional politicians who corrode the very system that is supposed to take care of the people in a nation.

But this word is not necessarily wrong.

Traditions can be a tool to build memories.  And for a dad (or any parent for that matter), these are non-negotiables.

As Christmas hits in less that 2 weeks, let me share with you a few traditions that has helped up build memories as a family through these years.

TREE TRIMMING.  I remember growing up getting home from school and finding the Christmas tree already fixed.  While it looked nice and beautiful, I never really had the joy of putting it together with my family.

Our Christmas tree today doesn’t have a theme.  You see trees that have bells theme or apples theme or snow man theme.  Ours is rather eclectic so to speak.  However, each ornament has a special meaning and story behind it like the very first ornament we ever had (a freebie from Shakey’s pizza) to our kids’ first ornament as a baby to trips we’ve taken, to home made ‘ugly’ looking ornaments yet has a special meaning.

We do a Christmas countdown after setting up the lights and the ornaments – 10-1 while every other light in the house is off and turn on just the christmas lights.  The effect is rather magical for the kids shout in glee.

All this is done over pizza and Pepsi.  This has been the food during tree trimming time through the years which is why a lot of our ornaments are ‘oily’, I guess.

…to be continued…